Although sex has probably ensured that you are now pregnant, this does not necessarily mean that everything will go smoothly during and after the pregnancy. What fears are there and how can you face them together? Because it is a special time to make love and it feels like more than just physical contact.
In the first half
In the first few months you probably don’t feel like having sex at all due to all the hormonal changes, fatigue and nausea. There is not much to see about your body yet, so this may take some getting used to for your partner. By expressing this, understanding this from each other and accepting it, one can maintain intimacy in the relationship. Sex can then suddenly become much more and becomes lovemaking in the form of cuddling, reassuring and comforting. In certain times when panic or fear strikes for a moment. As you surrender to the other, the feeling arises that the two of you will make it.
The second half
In this half you can get a lot of interest in sex. Your genitals have better blood flow due to pregnancy and your breasts are sensitive. This can make you feel excited all day long. Making love is much more intense than before and coming also seems much easier. The discomfort of the first months is gone and your rounder shapes make you feel super feminine. If the baby is growing well and you have no further complaints, this period can go hand in hand with a flourishing sex life. The birth will still have to wait a while.
Although we may feel like we are every man’s dream woman, it can feel very different for dad-to-be. He might prefer to massage your feet instead of a wild night. He may have to get used to the fact that the future mother (serene being) also strongly desires sex. Or perhaps a feeling that can be changed. It may be that this feeling is fueled by the fear of harming the baby. This is not possible, but if this remains an issue, you can ask the midwife while he is sitting next to you.
Sex after childbirth
You naturally hear many stories around you that sex after having children almost no longer happens or that it is often interrupted or is no longer as pleasant as before. Of course this is not necessary. After giving birth or while raising children, you will of course have less energy for it, so if the opportunity arises, don’t postpone it, but enjoy it !
Things that can stop men from having sex are: fear of having sex because of my pain, difficulty with the combination of sex and mild feelings of pride (because you did a beautiful job with that birth!) or men who want to go too fast. and want to act as if nothing happened. As a woman, you may feel that you would rather wait until you are back to your normal self and look like you did before. But you may also be afraid that it will hurt.
However, it may also be that you still feel super feminine and would like to have sex due to the good blood circulation and the pride of your mother’s belly and breasts. If your partner wants to be very careful, this can cause misunderstandings. Maybe this makes you feel (unjustly) rejected and it becomes a fight instead of lovemaking.
Essentially, you have to keep remembering that you have only grown to love each other more because you are now parents together. Therefore, continue to communicate with each other about how you both feel about sex. In practice there is of course less time for this than before, so the best advice is to be patient. Don’t think too much and trust that everything will turn out fine.
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